Pamper Movie Night

This Friday I got my feedback from the school I wanted to go to next year. Unfortunately, I got a negative advice, meaning they don't think I will graduate at this point in my life. Meaning I am not accepted.
This past school year, I did everything possible to get a higher change of getting accepted. So it's an understatement to say I was disappointed. A lot of people around me were positive I was going to get in, because this was the only thing I wanted and was willing to set everything aside for it.

The letter had more impact on me than I thought it ever would. After all, it was just one of the thousand schools, right? But it did, and it resulted in me not wanting to do anything. I sat at the dinner table all night, sobbing. 'What do I do now?' 'I failed at something I worked so hard for' 'Do I want to apply again next year?' 'Do I look for something else?' Were just some of the questions that crossed my mind.

The next day I had to work, so I would be fine during the day. And when there wasn't really much to do, I decided to have a night for myself. Watch a sad movie, do my nails, no make-up, tea, chocolate and the lights dimmed. (And let's not forget Tumblr!)

And when my parents went to a party, I went for it.

'Dear John'

Nails

A big cup of tea and my own chocolate bar

Laptop, iPad and iPod all geared up

It really helped me to let everything loose for a night and not hold back.
What do you do when you are sad or get a bit of bad luck?

A New Job! Primark Haul

In April this year, some bad things happened at my previous job (mentioned in my last blog post)  and this was the final thing to quit my job.


BUT: since I cannot sit still, I started looking for a new one (after ofcourse, a few weeks of rest and processing what had happened). I applied for a job at the clothing store my granddad used to work, had my job interview and got hired!
I was able to start the week after, and had to wear all black clothes, with a serious look. The only thing that suited that in my wardrobe, a blazer I purchased recently. This only meant one thing: SHOPPING!!!
So I called one of my friends, we took the train and went all out in Primark.
Below some pictures of some tops I bought (includes the prices)

€ 9,-

€ 9,-

€4,50

€11,-

€9,-

€11,-

€11,-

the zipper on the back of the shirt.

The last two shirt were not available in my size, but a normal price for a shirt would be around €15,- or higher. So I bought them anyways, and thankfully my mom knows how to tailor them! 


Hope you liked my little 'sneak peak' of my work-wardrobe! Let me know if you want more Haul posts.

Love, Daniëlle
x

Link to my previous post: http://brightlightsinlife.blogspot.nl/2013/05/my-senior-year.html

Hair for today :)

Inspired by Cherry Healey, a TV personality from the UK. Check her out!

My Senior Year

Senior year, the year where one chapter closes and (hopefully) new ones open.
The year where I was going to be finding out if I was going to graduate or get accepted in to a new school. But most important: the year of fun and friends! For me, this was also the year I made a promise to myself to look 'good' at my graduation, gala and every other party around school.

At the start of this year, one the first day actually, I got my schedule and found out I had my old History teacher from a few years ago. We never really got along and I can't seem to understand anything she explains in class. Since I knew I was able to do History, I had a different teacher where I got the best marks in class, I tried to move mountains to switch classes. Unfortunately, nothing could be done except: talk to her about it.
It doesn't sound like a big deal, but it was. I, a 16 year old student, was going to tell a teacher, with 20 years of teacher, her way of teaching was chaotic. And in the beginning of the year, I was nowhere as confident about my actions as I am today.
Where we are now? I am working on an official complaint for her, that will force her to change or look at herself.

While making the decision whether or not to talk to her, I needed someone in school to talk to. The person I had trusted last year and the year before, my all time favourite teacher, was not allowed to teach. She, also my mentor, had a burn-out and her husband and mother-in-law were both in the hospital in a critical condition. It wasn't sure if she was going to able to teach this year.

You never know what you have till you loose it. 

I found this out multiple times throughout the year, and missing her was one of the times. It's the feeling of needing someone to talk to, but not having one. So I ended up locking it all up inside, with the occasional outbursts of emotions.
Thankfully I developed a good relationship with my department leader, and could talk to him whenever I needed someone (It still wasn't the same as talking to my mentor, I could always tell if she was doing okay or not, but I had someone).

Besides school, I was working in a local pharmacy, on Thursday night and Saturday. I started in August, and  resigned on April 6th 2013. I was being treated as their dog, having to do all the things they didn't want to do. It got to a point where I could only work on times they wanted me, not the other way. I got pushed around and the lack of respect and trust reached the top when I forgot to call about when I was going to be able to work after being sick. They didn't believe me and I got yelled at. This was the last straw. Two days after this happened, I was in the store with my dad signing my resignation letter.

My working attire of the pharmacy.
I took this picture when I had just started.

I couldn't understand what I had done wrong, what I did to make them act that way. It had to be me, because why would they only treat me that way? What did I do that made them hate me so much? What should I have done differently? I started doubting every little thing about myself again, and wasn't sleeping because of the wondering. Thanks to my mum, I let it go and moved on. I had my school to worry about, my intake on AMFI, and was in full preparation for the senior gala for school.

A month after singing my release, I was at the office at my new job, making it official to start working there. It was a process of two weeks total. I called, emailed my CV the same day. Got a call two days after, and the next week I had my interview and was hired.

Last thing in my senior year: Working out / Working on myself
I have never been the girl to have to most self-confidence or the highest self-esteem, and for the last four years, this has caused me to say 'no' to a lot of parties or activities with other students. Since this was my last year, I felt like I had nothing to lose.
So this year, which started in September 2012, I started doing squats, jumping jacks and crunches. Every morning after I woke up and every evening before bed. But school was getting more and I started to neglect the plan I had made for myself (which, if I look back, was way too much to handle). After failing this, I went to the gym with my mum, and we did all kinds of things like dancing, body pump, balance and what not. But soon, school became more and there was no more time. We gave up our memberships and I kept on doing workouts for a few weeks before stopping.
This went on until I found out 'Insanity'. It's a really intense boot-camp workout, and you are extremely tired while doing it. But I felt better after. Since I am now in my last three weeks of school, studying for tests and making them, I haven't been able to work out :(

I recently realised that working out is not supposed to be about losing weight, it should be about getting healthier and feeling better about yourself. In the beginning of this year, I set the bar so high I got demotivated. The new goals I set for myself are more realistic and I can skip one a week if I am just too busy with other things.

This has been my senior year so far! I hope you got to know me a little more :)
Love, Daniëlle

One Direction concert

After trying to get tickets back in November, trying again a day before the concert and wanting to go out of the country to see them, I had to give up on my dream to see the guys of One Direction in the flesh. A day before the concert, new tickets were being sold, and I saw my change to try again. Without succes. Via Twitter and Instagram I found out that Niall and Harry already were in The Netherlands. I wanted to go and look for them, but after crying over everything for two hours, my mum wouldn't let me go.

So the next day, also the day of the concert AND my brother' birthday, I didn't want to get out of bed and start studying again for my finals. I dragged myself out and started on school. A normal day, doing some shopping for my brother' party and buying dinner for the night. My parents were going to be eating rice, and I was going to be munching on a salad with chicken en pasta (Side note: I hate rice, and with my braces, it's a struggle to eat). We even had a little chat with the neighbour.
Once returned inside, I checked twitter and my mum checked her emails.
Now, this is where it get's exciting!
She had entered the waitinglist that same morning, because there was talk about more tickets coming that day. She went on the website, and was able to buy ONE ticket. I couldn't sit still anymore, and even as I'm typing this, my hands get clammy and I'm shaking a little. So while I was walking around the house, my mum paid for the ticket and told me 'I got it. It's yours. You're going to see them.'

My mind went blank. I, the person that has tried so many times to get tickets and cried because she wasn't able to go, had a ticket. Just one, so I was not allowed to call up my friend and yell that we were going, but I was going.

An hour after we had purchased the ticket, I was in the Ziggo Dome Arena waiting for the show to start. It was total madness before, because the had asked us to wear orange because of the new king, and I had to look for something orange that would still look a little normal. I ended up wearing my brother his old soccer shirt, which is four sizes to big. But hey! I had orange on and I was going to see them.

And to say it was amazing... Huge understatement. It was everything I expected and more. I did miss my best friend next to me to fangirl with, but the fact that I didn't know anybody made me feel free. I screamed and lost my voice, and left a few tears roll as the show progressed.

I can easily say it was the best night I've had so far, and I will never forget all the things that happened that night. Like the fan-actions that were held during 'Change my mind' and 'Little things'. Or the wardrobe change from casual to orange suits with matching jerseys, all orange! Or the moments when the guys got a little emotional seeing/hearing the crowd (I can go on forever...).

So here are some pictures :)